Ichigoless: A Story of 7 New, Blue & Chewy Mews
by Mew Kugofed
Summary: Ichigo was always the center of attention. Now, each character gets their own spotlight. Masaya dies, Pai takes on an active role in the community, Mint's sister is introduced, and . . . you'll just have to read it to find out! -
1. POUF: The Prologue

"Pouf"

Georgia: HI!

Carolina: HI!

Kish: You two were serious?

G: Yes! We're putting our story on display for the world to mock!

C: -_holds up cue card_- -_cue card reads: "No! 'For the world to SEE!'"_-

G: I mean, SEE! Why would people LAUGH at our story! It's so . . . . . . . . FANTASTIC!

C: Well, maybe the public isn't ready for this story yet, I mean, it is a little on the...odd side, isn't it?

Kish: -_has managed to sneak away_- -_is tackled by THEM and dragged back to sit in between Georgia and Carolina_-

G: o.O;; ... You've got a point ... You know . . . no one knows who Kyle or Worker Pai is ... Scary, how ignorant the world is, huh?

C: Well, it isn't every day that a couple of lunatics develop an entire story from question #14 on a Science test.

G: xx;; I got that one wrong ...

C: Well I didn't. The "teacher" --

G: You mean that uneducated, portly thing that yells at us from in front of the room?

C: Yep, that's the one! Anyways, it said that my answer of "Kyle stopped for a picnic lunch and a brief visit to the restrooms" was perfectly acceptable.

G: Um... right. ANYWAY, our point is: We decided that TMM was not given very much thought when it was first written. I mean, WHY would the main character, Ichigo, be paired with something like Masaya when a perfectly good potential boyfriend like Kish was just lying around, waiting! Honestly! Thus, we've added many-a changes. So many, in fact, that we fear we may confuse you poor souls.

C: This, being the prologue chapter, has none of the actual story. However, even as  
the creators, we(aliases: Carolina and Georgia . . . and Patty, too. She's sorta relevant . . .)  
deem our story is rather bamboozling, mostly due to some of the additional characters we  
stuck in. So, it would be helpful to skim through this chapter just to get a feel for  
everything. Or you could just jump ahead and read what will be remarkably hard to grasp:)  
In our little pre-chapter, we'll include the outline we created for the upcoming  
chapters, a convenient list of our new characters with their generalized personalities, and a  
few extra bits that we've thrown in to spice things up.

**Disclaimer- No, neither Carolina nor Georgia posses copyrights to anything Tokyo Mew Mew related. Unfortunately. On the bright side, we don't own the forever-humiliating Mew Mew Power- a cause for celebration!**

Foreword:

_Written by Georgia, Edited by Carolina, and Vaguely Acknowledged by Patty_

We've added many, many new characters (about 9 or so), and we understand if the  
story may begin to lean towards the confusing side. Carolina and I apologize in advance  
for the hassle it very well may take to commit all of this to memory. These are all  
characters created by three somewhat delusional/reasonably insane girls (pseudonyms being Patty, Carolina, and Georgia respectively) through our roleplay. The original cast of the  
five Mew Mews are still standing in all their glory, of course, but most of the story  
revolves around the aliens boys (ESPECIALLY KISH - ).

A few of our new characters are part of a new set of Mew Mews. Only instead of  
having Ryou and Keiichiro decided to manipulate the genetic coding of a whole other  
group of girl just to aquire a few more waitresses, we've given the spotlight to Pai for  
once. Pai (apparently) concluded after a particularly humiliating loss at the hands of Tokyo  
Mew Mew, that the aliens needed more than three people on their side. He targeted, oh,  
say about 7 or so randomly-chosen girls of varying ages and personalities and . . . um,  
Mew Mew-ized them, I guess. So now the group lives up on he ship with the other three  
aliens. We'll try our best to give each new character enough special attention so our  
lovely, lovely audience gets a chance to know each one-

In addition, we would like to apologize if our preferred pairings do not sit well  
with some of our readers. This is NOT an Ichigo/Kish fic, an Ichigo/Ryou fic, nor is it an  
Ichigo/Masaya. In fact, Ichigo- for once- is NOT the center of attention. And Masaya, that  
pathetic son-of-a-gun, doesn't even make it through Chapter 2. The reason we chose to  
post our story is to share it with other Tokyo Mew Mew fans, so we do include some  
Pudding/Tart and Ichigo/Aoyadama-kun(from the anime). Most of our pairings feature  
OC (other characters), which we understand that our readers are not aquatinted with  
them. I(Georgia, in case you forgot) could POSSIBLY do a Kish/Ichigo fic on request.  
I'm NOT a fan of the pairing only because Ichigo seems unworthy of such a totally  
awesome and adorable character as Kish, but on the other hand, if it's for Kish's sake, I'll  
do it But ONLY for Kish. I point-blank refuse to write a Masaya fic because he irks me.  
Very much. In case you're still undecided, peruse our displayed outline below.

Characters:

Amai:  
The Basics- As a young girl, Amai was an orphan. During her childhood stay at the orphanage, she had the chance to experience a ball in honor of the fundraising auction the wealthy Shirogane family held to benefit Amai's orphanage. At the ball, Amai and Ryou met and- after some shy, 4-year-old level conversation- they even danced. Ryou had to leave eventually, but he promised to always be there for her. As she grew up, she remained close friends with Ryou. At one point, Ryou offered Amai a place to stay in one of the apartments that he rented out for the occasional scientists and technicians he hired to come stay abroad for a few days (like business trips). But then, during an alien attack, Amai was captured, taken aboard the ship, and made into a Mew Mew.

As the first "experiment", as Pai refers to the girls, Amai is the most sweet-tempered and placid of all of the alien-brand Mew team. Unfortunately, this is why Amai could never stand up to Pai as he orders her around more than the others and gives her an excessive work-load. This bossing around and over-working is Pai's odd way of showing his affection. You see, Pai has the smallest little crush on Amai- even though she's a human. He's gotten attached to her, yet he refuses to show it. Not at all. Not ONE bit. I mean, Pai is still Pai. This has caused Amai to believe that Pai is simply out to make her life misirable. So when Ryou rescues her from this awful fate and offers her a place to stay in Cafe Mew Mew, Amai jumps at the opportunity and leaves the ship.

Name Meaning + Animal- Amai means sweet and she's infused w/ the endangered African zebra

Makie:  
The Basics- A half-breed girl (alien father, human mother) who suffered a moderately  
distressing childhood considering that purist leaders of the alien home world disliked the  
fact that Makie was not a full-blooded alien. Her mother and father were ...um, removed  
from the picture ... and chibi-Makie was to suffer the same fate. But of course, she didn't,  
seeing as how my character wouldn't be of very much use to me if she was... you know,  
DEAD. However, it wasn't a clean getaway. She got a great big scar on her back. I'd  
explain it in a more illustrative way, but then I might have to bump the rating up a bit . . . -;;;

Makie lived on the streets (of Earth) for a year and a half, maybe two years- until  
she was picked up by the aliens and went to live up on a ship.  
She's learned to become more open as her (emotional) wounds healed over time, but she's still not very . . . cuddly. Her adopted sense of aggression coupled with the inbred wild nature of the carnivore she's infused with make her hot-headed and stormy. Especially when Pai's around. The sight of him REALLY gets her mad. However, without his aggrivating presence, she's considerably more happytastic.

Name Meaning + Animal- Makie is a type of sushi, we think+ infused w/ endangered  
San Jaoquin kit fox

Sage:  
The Basics- Even as Mint's younger sister, Sage- oddly enough- is not a tea-drinker. She has got identical wide brown eyes to her sibling and is very close to Mint. Although she comes from the same wealthy family, Sage is more naive in the sense that money doesn't set her apart from others. She is very welcoming and always ready to accept a new friend.

Sage, who's only about Pudding and Tart's age, was taken captive aboard the aliens' ship during a "mission" as a sort of ransom against Mew Mint. However, Sage was then fused with the endangered African lion and Pai decided that she would be a good asset to his auxiliary Mew team. She hasn't been allowed to return home just yet, but don't worry- she's very well-taken care of.

As the whole Mew Mew concept is new to her, often battling may seem to Sage as a bit more nerve-wracking and fearful process than she's ready for. But with the help of her close friends, Makie and Kaida, she's learned very quickly with only a small amount of experience.

Name Meaning + Animal- Sage means . . . sage. The herb, you know? She's fused with the endangered African lion.

Keihi and Koumi:  
The Basics- While these two girls are quite a bit older than the others (about Zakuro's age  
group), they are very immature indeed. Both girls are extremely mischievous, shameless,  
and have no regard for authority. Not to mention that Koumi has a slightly uncontrollable  
tendency to steal.

They are identical twins but since this is anime, they're drawn with subtle  
differences in the hair(they each have a different hair style which remains constant), eye  
styles, and color(N/A: You know how Ichigo is pink, Minto is blue and Purin is yellow,  
etc.? Yes, well, both girls' hair and eye color are black, only Keihi has indigo-tinted shine  
in her hair and eyes and Koumi has a crimson tinge in her eyes and hair)

Name Meaning + Animal- "Keihi" -- "cinnamon" and infused with the white Bengal tiger /  
"Koumi" -- "spice" + infused with the orange Siberian tiger

Kiken:The Basics- Kiken comes from one of the very last wealthy families on the aliens' home planet. She was sent to abide in the ship only because her father wanted her to spend some time abroad and get to know the everyday person. However, this does not mean that Kiken can't still enjoy the comforts of home. Using her weekly allowance of a great deal of yoken-, she's managed to fill several closets full of designer clothes and brand-name shoes. She's even got scented, tinted, lightly-feathered, and tastefully-seasoned tissues. Just to give you an idea of her budget . . . Besides from yoken(money), the other thing Kiken gets from her privileged father is a thick British accent. Please. Don't ask why. She's very airy and condescending, but can occasionally do something selfless if she REALLY, REALLY tries. Also, she's part of the Kiken- Pai- Amai - Ryou love-quadrilateral o.O;

Name Meaning + Animal- Kiken means danger in the sense that she is a danger to the succession of the missions. The girl really does no work at all. BUT, she does make up for that by totally exhausting the ship's budget. And she's infused with nothing.

Kaida:  
The Basics- Kiken's little sister. She's not nearly as superficial as her older sibling, nor  
does she have the fashion sense. However, Kaida is extremely intellectual for her age and  
tags along behind Pai, regardless of how blatantly he ignores her. She's a bit rough around  
the edges like Makie and therefore enjoys hanging around with her, as well as Sage.

Name Meaning + Animal- Kaida means "little dragon". I am aware that this is not a fruit.  
It doesn't have to be since Kaida is not a Mew Mew.

Kyle:  
As you may recall, the Japanese sub-titled anime includes a lovely lady from America  
named Mary MaGuire. Remember her lovely white swan dress thing? Well, she also has-  
in addition to the dress- a son. Named Kyle. Who featured in our Science test. Remember? Remember? REMEMBER!

Umm . . . he's not a Mew Mew, or an alien. You see, on Carolina's and Georgia'sscience test there was a question, question #14 to be exact, involving some delightful lad  
named Kyle. Question #14 ever-so politely informed us that Kyle was riding his bike.  
There was a graph which displayed his biking progress. Yes, seriously. Carolina happened  
to answer #14 with "Kyle stopped for a picnic lunch and a brief visit to the restroom."  
This was correct. Georgia(who is indeed reasonably clever in all areas except Science  
because our large, round-shaped Sci. teacher apparently finds teaching her students to be  
a nonessential and therefore makes no effort to do so) got the answer wrong, but found  
Carolina to be a comic genius. This is why Kyle is to be in our story. We've decided he is  
to be Mary MaGuire's son, for all of you who have seen the Japanese sub-titles anime  
(nevermind the moronic drivel that is Mew Mew Power...).  
The role he play in our tale is . . . um, well, pretty frivolous, I suppose . . . We might even be possessed to make him Minto's boyfriend, unless reviewers protest against it.

Mountain Masaya:

He looks surprisingly like the normal, everyday Masaya,  
and his name is very similar-- Aoydama-kun  
((if you have seen the Japanese subtitled version, you know what I mean)) For those who haven't, he looks just like Masaya Aoyama, only angrier. Thus,  
we have dubbed him Mountain Masaya.  
((Oh, come on! You know! The one who hung around otters? Remember? Yeah!))

Pai/Worker Pai/Smiley Pai: Well, as you all already know, Pai isn't the most popular thing. We've decided that this is because he is much too stringent and boring. He needs to let his hair down and have a little fun! So, we've helped him along by encouraging Pai to take a more active role in the community. As Worker Pai, this alien mans the telephones at a local orthodontist's office, sweeps up the fallen strands of hair on the floor of the local barber shop, is a merchant in the Gobi Desert, and is a self-proclaimed linguini chef. Lovely. And, in addition to that, he also works part-time as Smiley Pai- the star of a public television's educational preschool program.

Preview:

Our basic plot outline is as followed: (brace yourself)

I. Chapter 1: Preventing Disaster

a. Kish and Ryou meet Ichigo properly (which is to say, not in a lovey-dovey way)

b. Alien crew is introduced; relationships + personalities are vaguely established

c. Mew Mews find Pudding; Tart's more involved this time 'round

d. The two are given candy and try to set loose the zoo's animals

II. Chapter 2: Masaya Dies

a. Masaya dies

III. Chapter 3: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly Cowboy Hats

a. The whole "We-must-pursuade-Zakuro" propaganda

b. Her UGLY hat is proved crucial in the saving of Earth

IIII. Chapter 4: No Touchy

a. Tart experiences the joys of cable television and, as Georgia gripes and moans in

the background, watches Disney's "The Emperor's New Groove"

b. Tart rushes over to Pai's "lab" and tries to create his own

aminal-presto-changey-potion thingies

1. Without a recipe, mind you.

c. Kish is the unfortunate test subject

1. Becomes a panda, turtle, sheep, and many other things, including Ringo

2. Followed by debate over exactly which animal Ringo is infused with

V. Chapter 5: Randomly-Placed, Sappy Drama

a. Pai/Amai/Ryou love triangle solved, with Ryou winning

b. On other hand, Pai's got back-up: Kiken. Georgia would very much like to

know how this goes about happening, seeing as no one has told her . . . (elbows Patty)

c. Kish and Makie sorta like each other. Georgia can't wait. She's already thought

up about 7 other ways for this to happen. Not the stupid way it happened in her fanfic.

d. Pudding 'n Tart! A blindingly sweet and fluffy sugar-rush in the form of writing.

e. Haru enters for the first time. Helps out in the kitchen. Something found highly

attractive by men like Keiichiro

f. Keihi and Koumi hit on random strangers

VI. Chapter 6: Mountain Masaya Saves the Day

a. To rid the Earth of humans, alien boys start a torrent of acid rain in Tokyo

b. Caution: Acid rain may cause upset stomach DNA. There have been mild cases

of Mew Mew girls turning into their animal for up to 24 hours. Side-effects also include

panic, loss of human vocal cords, and tardiness to major battles. Ask your doctor if acid

rain-hybrid is right for you. (Affected are Ichigo, Amai, Pudding, Makie, Sage, and Haru)

c. They each head for their "boyfriends" for help

1. Ichigo, who's been boyfriend-deprived since Chapter 2, sulks in the

forests and eventually meets up with Mountain Masaya, formerly known as

Aoyadama-kun

2. Falls in love with her late boyfriend's clone, despite Aoyadama-kun's

very obvious anger problem

d. MEANWHILE, the alien boys and the other Mew Mews fight amidst the Tokyo

Tower and its new appendage, the cacoon thing

1. Any day now, SOMEONE will notice the fox, ram, cat, lion, zebra, and

monkey running around everyone's ankles

VII. Chapter 7: An Incredible Deal For Only 87 Easy Payments of $2.99! Call now!

a. Keihi and Koumi play with water guns near the ship's central power generator

b. Black-out on ship

1. The electrical doors won't open and everyone's stranded in the bridge

with only emergency supplies

2. Emergency supplies and a Truth, Dare, Kiss, or Promise game

3. Which is just like Truth or Dare only with the extended options of

Kiss(absolutely anyone) and Promise(like a long-term Dare)

c. This opens many options in forms of . . .

1. Truth: Who's afraid of the dark! . ;; ;; .

2. Dare: Can Kiken withstand a makeover from Kaida and Sage?

3. Kiss: It's Amai's turn and the spinner's pointing at Pai . . . (wink wink)

4. Promise: Who'da thought Pai can keep his Promise to watch

Tellytubbies for that long? x0;;

VIII. Chapter 8: Kyle MaGuire's Picnic Lunch

a. The Mew Mew crew stops for a picnic lunch

b. Coincidentally enough, so has Kyle MaGuire

1. Thus proves true the Clark and Co. law of science that ties in flippers

with the rest of the scientific world

IX. Chapter 9: . . . and from Viewers Like You. Thank You.

a. To learn more morals and to have a better sense of self, the alien Mew Mews

are forced to participate in an educational television programme

b. Keihi and Koumi misinterpret this and are totally convinced that they now have

to actually host the children's programme

1. Somehow, Kish, Tart, Makie, Sage, Haru, Kiken, Kaida, and even Pai

also get dragged into hosting

c. Introducing:

1. The Theme Song

2."Talking About Our Feelings - with our friend Smiley Pai"

3. "Shapes, Shapes, All Around! -with our friend Miss Makie: The

Butterfly Girl"

4. "Sing-Songs! -with our friend Smiley Pai"

5. "Which One Doesn't Belong: The Grouping Game" -with our friends

Happy Elf Sage, Silly Elf Kaida, and Short Elf Tart

6. "Story Time" -with our Designated Reader, Smiley Pai

7. "Everyone's Special! Everyone's A Friend: A Lesson in Loving our

Neighbor -with our friends Miss Kiken and Sir Kish: The Royal Rulers of Friendshiptown

8. And "Let's Get Moving: Learn Fun Games Like Hopscotch, Jump

Rope, and Hula-Hooping -with our friend Sir Smiley Pai, the Old Prince of the Kingdom

of Funhairsalondom2, Friendshiptown's Favorite Neighbor!"

Why Aliens Have Ribbons!

Georgia: I'm sure you've noticed that Kish, Tart, and Pai have ribbons that move and wander about on their own. No, they are not in fact tails, but instead a system of ranking in their "military". Never mind that there are only three persons in the military. . .

Carolina: So...The longer your ribbons, the better warrior you are. Kish (of course) has the _longest_ ribbons of all three, so he is the best. Do you get it?

Georgia: -nods- In addition, the wrappy arm thingies they wear on their forearms are none other than a way of making other people around you feel stupid 'cuz they show how much SMARTER you are than the Average Joe!

(Pause) They indicate whether or not you have an adequate understanding of your studies. 'Cuz, you know, they all live in a sort of flying dorm room thingie, so they MUST go to school. . . .

Carolina: If you happen to have puffy, flowy arm thingies, such as Pai's it proves superior intellect in science and math. If they are also on your legs, you have knowledge in medics.

Georgia: And now for the minor details:

All alien males must don their hair with some sort of a ponytail (with wrappy things) in any form you please.

If you make it your business not to wear any shoes, then you are proclaiming to the world that you are indeed a youth.

Carolina: If you are confused, then please reread. This info is pertinent in the story, so study up! Maybe someday YOU will have some wrappy thingies!

Georgia: And if you are rather lazy and don't feel like commiting such a large amount of information to memory, you'll just have to read along, get confused, and assume that everything we say is right and pertaining to our aforementioned charts.


	2. Preventing Disaster

I. Chapter 1: Preventing Disaster

(Setting: Book 1 - last few pages - on Earth)

**Disclaimer: No, we don't own Tokyo Mew Mew. Honestly, do you think if we did, we'd let Ichigo and Masaya always be center-stage! And would Kish die! And would Pai be so . . . STUPID! NO! Also, We don't own rights to any of the Veggie Tales songs or references. Sadly.**

Carolina: This is entitled "Chapter 1" because it is. Before was just the prologue. Now, you lucky readers get to see the full extent of our madness.

Pai: -_scans the prologue_- You forgot to explain in simple terms what yoken is. You know that feeble-minded humans couldn't possibly comprehend our advanced system of currency.

Georgia: o.O -_uses remote control to switch to Worker Pai_-

Worker Pai: Well, now! Listen up, kids! Yoken is the word for currency on us aliens' home planet! Why we call it that? Well, it's because . . . um . . . . because, er . . . . -_looks to Carolina_-

C: Because it sounds like oxen, and that's the plural form of ox. Oxen are very special. That are related to cebus, which are very close to our hearts. Right?

G: Mm hmm! -_is straining to drag a large psychiatrist's lounge sofa over (hops on and breaks into song with Carolina_-

Both: ON THE DAY I GOT MY TOOTH, I HAD TO KISS MY GREAT AUNT RUTH! SHE HAD A BEARD . . . AND IT FELT WEIRD!

Worker Pai: Cebuuuuuuuu!

Us: CEBUUUUUU!

Tart: -_is a Pirate Who Doesn't Do Anything_- ..;;;;;

Zakuro: Oh . . . my . . . . -_adjusts her hat_- -_smiles at mirror-_ . . . . Cheese.

"I wanted to see the human trying to sabotage our plans. But. . ." a snide voice

from above said, "you're pretty cute!"

Ichigo tensed us, startled. Who was that? Suddenly, a figure appeared before her in

a flash of green and gold. Before she could even catch who it was, the figure leaned in

swiftly and . . . pinned her wrists to the wall. (N/A: You thought I was gonna write

"kissed her", right? Well . . . I'M NOT. Things are gonna be different this time 'round!Bwuahaha! That stupid kiss started Kish's obsession with that . . . thing . . . . that . . . that. . . demon in a skirt! So I'm writing this MY WAY! Hahahaaa!) Ichigo flinched. As she

tentatively reopened her eyes, she saw a emerald-haired boy about her age with the most

(beautiful) (wonderful) (gorgeous) (dazzling) startlingly golden eyes she'd ever seen. The

strange boy peered down at her as she was fixed to the wall, helpless. He looked her over

once . . . and then again. Ichigo opened her mouth to scream for help, but before she could

do so the green-haired boy cupped her face rather roughly with one long, elegant hand and

directed her attention to his face forcefully.

"Don't think I'll go easy on you just because you're pretty. You're in way over

your head, doll-face."

He released her wrists. Somehow, the boy could levitate up off the ground and-

from his stance in midair- he waggled his fingers good-bye.

"By the way, my name is Kish. I already know yours . . . Ichigo. See you later,

strawberry," he scoffed, playfully grinning. Before Ichigo could utter a sound, Kish

disappeared. Her mind reeled. What . . . ! How . . . ? He could levitate and teleport?

How's that possible! Ichigo stood in the town square, dazed. She lifted her hand and

gingerly brushed her fingertips over the slight bruises Kish's hand had left on her cheek.

'What a strange young man . . .'

Up on the ship, Kish returned to chaos. Two tall, dark haired girls were restlessly

making their way around the bridge of the ship, each in their own peculiar, haphazard

path. In the middle of the bridge were Tart and Kaida, both very loud as usual, who were

trying to have a civilized heated debate but were constantly bumped and shoved by the

two strange girls who were toying with every gadget, switch, lever and button within

reach. Kish noticed Pai, in the corner, ignoring the intense clamor with such restraint that

Kish deemed it possible that he actually got up extra early each morning and practiced this

bizarre sport, loving every minute of the strain.

"Pai," Kish called loudly in a futile attempt to divert Pai's attention away from his

computer screen, "you've got visito--"

"Well, well! Who do we have here?"

Kish was cut off by one of the twin girls suddenly leaning closer and closer to his

face, her lucid blue eyes peering into Kish's golden ones. "You're awfully cute! What's

your name, kid?"

A sly grin broke out on Kish's features. "You're not bad yourself, honey. I'm Kish.

Now what are two pretty girls like you doing up here with little ol' me?"

The girl, who looked to Kish much older than he, maybe 5 years more, backed

away from his face. "Koumi and I," she motioned to the other girl, who had scarlet eyes,

"were "ordered" to stay here after we got these darling tiger ears and tails from that one

over there." She jabbed her thumb over her shoulder in Pai's direction. "We're not so sure

he's learned how to talk yet, and we weren't gonna stay . . . but if there are any other guys

even half as adorable as you, toots, we'd be glad to crash here." The girl looked Kish up

and down and ruffled his hair. "See ya, kid."

The blue-eyed girl was summoned by her sister, Keihi, to go and check out their

new room. They sped down the hall, chattering away at full volume. Kish watched them

go until they turned a corner. Walking up to Pai, Kish hopped up to sit on the table next to

Pai.

"You stud, you! Turning girls into Mew Mews just so you can date them? I didn't

know you had it in you, Pai!" exclaimed Kish happily, slapping the older alien heartily on

the back as congratulations.

"I do NOT plan on dating either of them . . ." Pai responded uninterestedly, still

focused on the computer monitor.

"Why not? You can't find many girls who are cuter than that!"

Pai looked up from his computer to glare silently at the green-haired boy, hoping

that Kish would get the point. Kish, in fact, did not. In fact, he was now rather interested

with the fervent argument between Kaida and Tart which, oddly enough, was totally

undisturbed by the twins' commotion.

"YOU'RE stupider!", Tart jeered as he pulled his lower eyelid downwards with his

index finger.

"No, YOU'RE stupider!", Kaida retorted, making a face.

"Nuh-UH. You're STUPI--"

Pai sighed and, turning back to his computer screen, said, "I don't know why I

ever allowed those two on board . . ." Suddenly, a flickering gold blip on the computer

screen caught his eye. He sighed with even more enthusiasm than usual. "MAKIE.

REPORT TO THE BRIDGE."

. . . . . . . Nothing happened . . . . .

"TODAY, MAKIE."

"Keep your hair on, I'm coming," called a voice that sounded far off. Within

minutes, Makie sauntered into the area. "What is it, Your Highness?" she asked dryly. She

took a sip of a drink she was holding which radiated large, rolling clouds of fog. from the

top of the container. Pai's eyes narrowed at her beverage but remained silent.

"My sensors indicate that you were in my laboratory. I told you never to go in my

lab. What were you doing?"

"Making iced tea," Makie replied simply, holding up the smoking glass of so-called

iced tea and taking a swig of it. Kish, who was grinning like a loon in the face of the elder

alien, was swatted away by an aggravated Pai.

Kaida, having abandoned Tart, inquired, "Why is it . . um, foaming?"

"I had to use dry ice in it because Pai, the master chemist," Makie said

sarcastically, "doesn't have any plain water in his entire inventory. Wanna taste?"

"Hey, gimme some of that," Kish said, making his way over to where Makie was.

As Kaida tasted the iced tea, which apparently was quite good with cubes of

frozen carbon dioxide, Pai massaged his temples as if to soothe some sort of a throbbing

headache. "Alright, enough of this. Get to work."

"I beg your pardon?" Makie asked caustically.

"I know this must be difficult for your tiny brain to grasp . . ." Pai began.

At this, Makie flushed with indignance and crossed her arms across her chest

defiantly, glaring at Pai as he continued. Kish observed the tension between them like he

was watching a reality show on TV.

". . . but, yes, we are here to complete a mission. Get. To. Work."

"Doing what, exactly," she demanded, irritated.

"Finding and eliminating the fourth member of Tokyo Mew Mew. Take Tart,

Keihi, and Koumi with you. Oh, and Kish, you go, too. I cannot stand your presence for

another moment longer."

"Well, you're not the life of the party either, ya know."

Once they teleported back down on Earth, the group arrived in the park where a

petting zoo had visited for a few days.

(N/A: This setting is sort of a blend between the manga and the anime version of

when Pudding is found however, I may use a bit of dialogue between Kish and Pudding

from the anime, which I DO NOT own.)

From the middle of a small crowd, a loud and energetic voice could be heard

shouting,

"Thank you, THANK YOU, na no da you're TOO kind! Thank you for clapping

for Pudding's act na no da! Pudding loves the lime light na no da! DON'T BE SHY;

TIPS ARE GREATLY APPRECIATED, NA NO DA!"

Makie and the twins pushed their way to the front of the crowd as Tart and Kish

watched from above, where they were floating about the commotion. In the center of the

circle of people was a small blonde girl, balancing on an oversized ball, walking a

tightrope and swinging from tree branches. After each routine, the crowd clapped with

moderate enthusiasm, some even tossing a bit of loose change at her feet. At this, the

young girl beamed with genuine delight. Tart, levitating just a bit over the throng of

pedestrians, couldn't help but blush a light crimson at the tiny blonde laughing with

appreciative joy at the trifling amount of tips she was granted.

"Thanks for coming to see Pudding's show na no da, and she loves you ALL!

Pudding is going to take a break now na no da, but PLEASE all come back later for her

NEXT performance na no da! AND PUDDING SO GRACIOUSLY THANKS HER

FANS FOR THE WONDERFUL TIPS NA NO DA!"

The crowd thinned and Kish landed, striding over to the wide-eyed child. "Hi," he

said, strangely casual. ( The next few lines do not belong to me; I borrowed them from the

anime as an attempt to give the story some authenticity .;; )

"Wh-who are you, na no da!" she asked.

"I am . . . an angel," Kish replied. Tart rolled his eyes and scowled at the back of

Kish's head for toying with her like this.

"What's with you?" Makie whispered, noticing that Tart was not enjoying the fun.

She bent down and stretched Tart's cheeks out, anime-style.

Tart, shaking her off, retorted with resentment, "Kish can be such a jerk

sometimes. She seems cool."

Makie raised her eyebrows at this uncharacteristic empathy from Tart, but

nevertheless diverted her attention back to the conversation.

"LIAR, na no da!" the girl shouted. "An angel wouldn't have an EVIL face that ,

na no da!"

The twins burst out into a fit of giggles as Kish sorta "fell", in a way only anime

characters can, you know. Even Makie was finding it hard to contain her laughter.

"What a rude little girl," the green-haired boy responded. "And to think that I fell

from the heavens to grant your wish . . . Oh wait, I think you call those "fallen angels". . ."

"GO AWAY, na no da!" she shouted, sounding more confident than she felt. "Na

no da, Pudding does NOT want to talk to you!"

". . . He name's Pudding . . ." Tart muttered to himself in the background.

"You're bluh-shing!" Koumi sang while flicking one of his pigtails. Of course, this

only made Tart flush an interesting shade of maroon.

"I'm afraid we can't do that; we've got business with you, Pudding," Kish sneered.

Makie, Keihi and Koumi- each in their own Mew Mew outfit- surrounded Pudding and

closed off all means of escape.

"So," said Kish, "how does Pai want this done exactly: after we get her soul, do

we kill her or bring her to the ship?"

"NEITHER," a confident voice asserted from behind the group. Six heads turned

around to see three girls, each in a uniform of their respective color. The foremost girl,

who was covered head-to-toe in pink including her hair and her eyes oddly enough,

pointed her index finger accusingly at Kish. The green-haired alien looked her over

apathetically, his thin, elegant eyebrows furrowing in annoyance.

"Onee-chan!" Pudding cheered enthusiastically.

"How dare you try to harm an innocent child! Mew Ichigo will not allow such

offense!" Mew Ichigo cried. The three summoned their weapons with much glitter and the

appropriate sound effects.

Striking her trademark pose, Mew Ichigo announced with vim, "For the future of

Earth, we will serve you! Ribbon Strawbe--!"

"Hey, HOLD IT you!" Koumi shouted at Mew Ichigo, interrupting the attack

shamelessly. "How can you SAY such a thing?"

"Wh-what? What did I say?" stammered Mew Ichigo uncertainly.

"You said that you'd serve US, for the future of Earth! You can't attack us now.

Not after you publicly vowed to join us!" Keihi accused Mew Ichigo, fully aware of what

Mew Ichigo really meant.

Taken aback, Mew Ichigo drew her head back tentatively. "No! I mean, I'll serve

the people of Earth for their future!"

"That's not what I heard!"

"B-but I always say that!" Mew Ichigo protested. "I can't just CHANGE it!

Besides, everybody KNOWS I mean I'll serve the people of Tokyo!"

"We don't! We're new around here!"

Tart, who was growing increasingly impatient, hovered over to Pudding.

"Pudding does not understand, na no da!" the small girl declared vehemently.

"I don't get it either. They're all stupid."

"Why, na no da?"

"Uh . . .um, they don't take anything seriously . . . and they think they're so great

just 'cuz they're older and stuff."

"Oh . . .OH WELL," Pudding said brightly. "Na no da, Pudding would like to

know your name and if you want this." She reached into her pocket and pulled out a

handful of colorfully-wrapped hard candy.

Tart stared down at the candy. "You're giving me that? . . ."

"Yes, yes, na no da! The candy was given to Pudding as a tip from a red-haired

girl, but Pudding does not need it! Pudding would like to get rid of it na no da!"

"And so you'd figure you'd dump it on me. . .?" Tart asked dryly.

"YEAH, NA NO DA!"

" . . . Why not!"

Meanwhile, the three Mew Mews and the twins were still going at it.

"I obviously don't want to serve YOU GUYS! When I say "I'll serve YOU" I

mean "YOU" as in the crowd of people I defend!"

"Well, I don't know about you, but I don't see any crowds!"

"I KNOW but--"

"HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!"

"HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEE!"

"WHEEEEEE! LET'S GO ON THE SLIDE AGAIN!"

"NO, NO! LET'S GO ON THE SWINGS NA NO DA! PUSH ME, NA NO

DA, PUSH ME!"

Mew Ichigo was rather rudely interrupted by a sudden explosion of noise.

Everyone, now thoughrouly startled, whirled around to see what the fuss was about. On

the ground where Pudding and Tart once stood was a handful of empty candy wrappers

and the two children in question were having their way with the playground. Screaming (in

joy, supposedly), Pudding and Tart raced about the park, swinging from high places,

jumping up and down on only the frailest of things, and playing rather roughly with nearly

everything they came in contact with.

"OOH, NA NO DA! LOOK TAR-TAR! THIS IS WHERE THE PETTING

ZOO'S ANIMALS SLEEP!"

"HA HA HA! THAT WALRUS LOOKS SILLY! I WANNA PLAY WITH

IT!"

"SO DOES PUDDING! OH! OH, NA NO DA! PUDDING FOUND THE

KEYS, NA NO DA, TO THE JAGUARS' CAGES!

"I WANT THE KEYS! I WANNA PLAY WITH THE RHINO!

"What kind of a petting zoo has walruses, jaguars, and rhinos?" Koumi wondered.

"Perhaps they're convinced that children are more durable these day . . ." Keihi

offered.

"Durable? Tart? The same Tart who cried over a paper cut last week?" Makie

asked, her hand on her hip. "Tart! Taaaaaaart! Tart, GET BACK HERE!" Makie

called after him. She called several more times, but still got no response. Her frustration

began to get the better of her. "TART! TAAAART! YOU LITTLE MIDGET!

STOP TEASING THE HIPPOS!"

The next morning, Pai, having finished his Alien Newspaper (The Daily Ribbon)

and his coffee, turned to a human newspaper from Tokyo. The headlines read: "MASS

HAVOC!". Pai muttered to himself as he read, "Mmm. . . . fourth Mew Mew found . . .

zoo animals set loose . . . Earth teleprompter impaled by petting zoo rhino . . . mmm . . .

those responsible are a short blonde girl and a shorter, ginger-haired girl . . . . I see- Kish!"

The green-haired alien didn't even look up as he raided the refrigerator, two slices

of toast in his mouth. "Hmm?"

"Where's Tart?"

Kish, having finally found the jam, put both the toast and the jam on the table

which freed his mouth. "Tart? In his room. Shouting about some "stupid humans calling

him a girl" or something."

". . . And what did you do to stop him?"

"I reminded him that they also said he was shorter than Pudding."


	3. Masaya Dies

II. Chapter 2: **Masaya "Dies"**

**Disclaimer: We don't own Tokyo Mew Mew. This is both good and bad. The bad part is that we don't own Kish or Zakuro's hat, but the good part is that we don't own Masaya either.**

_Semi-Diclaimer: Look, if you're a Masaya fan, just don't read it. Save yourself the trouble of flaming, because either way he's gotta go -_

It is late August, and there's not a single dry eye for miles. The entire neighborhood has attended a funeral at the local church. Flowers and incense adorn the alter. Condolences are respectfully given. Everyone is reminding each other of all their favorite memories of him. Even those who barely knew him can speak of his good manners, kind nature, and diligent take to his studies. No one knew exactly how he passed away. He was absent from school for three days, and with no explanation. Two girls who referred to themselves as Carolina and Georgia began telling everyone that he had been eaten alive by Yogurt, his pet rabbit. Masaya was no where to be seen for the next two days. The neighborhood assumed that the girls were being sincere.

In the front pew of the church, five girls and two young men dab their eyes and hang their heads in respect for the late Masaya Romeo Aoyama.

What? . . . Don't tell me you all didn't know his middle name . . .

. . . While the employees of Cafe Mew Mew attend a beautiful funeral service, a family is on vacation in Hawaii! . . .

"Dear! Where's the sunscreen?" the mother asked, rummaging through their hotel room.

"Right there on the nightstand, Darling!" her husband replied, flipping through the television channels while stretching out on the bed.

"Ah, found it. Thanks, Dear. Where's our son?" she asked.

"Masaya's right behind the hotel, Darling, in the outdoor pool."

In aforementioned outdoor pool of a hotel in Hawaii, Masaya Aoyama was walking alongside the pool's edge and suddenly lost his balance, falling over. He splashed into the pale blue water which chilled his entire body. To a person of normal intelligence, this would have been a welcome change from the scorching heat of the day; however, Masaya took this as a sign that the polar ice caps were refreezing. So, he took a moment to shout in joy at the thwarting of global warming. People stared.

After a while, his eyes began tingling from the chlorine. He jumped out of the pool in terror, fearing that he was blind (totally disregarding the fact that he could still see). Masaya ran over to his beach chair and towel. Just about now, the chlorine stopped stinging and the entire incident was erased from his teeny, tiny mind. The civilians watching, however, would be scarred for life.

Masaya so-intelligently noticed that he was quite wet after falling in the pool, and so he picked up his towel to dry himself off. As he lifted the towel, his cell phone tumbled out. Masaya picked it up and realized with a shock that since his vacation was on such short notice, he'd never gotten a chance to tell Ichigo he'd be away. He decided to text message her: _-Ichigo?-_

His response from Ichigo was an abrupt:_ -Who's this?-_

Masaya was surprised. Ichigo always recognized his number. He replied: _-Me-_

Silence. Masaya tried again and again: _-Ichigo?- _. . . _-I'm in Hawaii- . _. . _-Sry I didn't tell u b4 - _. . . _-Ichigo?- _. . . _-U there?-_

Despite his multiple text messages, Masay got no response. About 20 minutes late, he finally received an answer:_ -Masaya?-_

_-No-_

Ichigo was confused. "No"? What did he mean by "no"? She saw his number on her phone. But . . . Masaya was dead, right? His Yogurt ate him. The rabbit was said to have finished him off in only seven bites. Could it . . . could she ACTUALLY be contacting the dead? This was SO COOL!

_-R u in heaven?- _she asked.

This, sadly, didn't strike Masay as odd. He does, after all, have a very small brain. Masaya looked around the outdoor pool. There was a bright sun, a cool breeze . . . why yes, it was like heaven. He answered: _-Yes. It's very nice-_

Another half hour wait followed, but Ichigo's response eventually read: _-What's Jesus look like?-_

Again, Masaya wasn't thrown off by the weird question. The clerk at the lobby happened to be a kind man by the name of Jesuis (pronounced: hay SOOS). Masaya didn't even stop to consider how or why Ichigo would know about a desk clerk in Hawaii, so he text messaged back:_ -Skinny. Got a beard.-_

Masaya looked into the lobby through a window and decided to add a bit about the particular tee shirt the man had on._ -He's wearing white-_

Back in Japan, Ichigo was shocked. SHe'd never contacted the dead before! Did it ever occur to her that maybe, JUST MAYBE, Masay wasn't dead but instead actually in Hawaii like he'd said before? NO: ) She continued to text message her "late" boyfriend:

_-I miss u-_

_-Me 2-_

_-Can you come home now?-_

_-No-_

Ichigo didn't respond back after Masaya so-articulately explained that he could not return at the moment (because the next plane didn't leave for anouther four hours, duh).

Ichigo was heart-broken.

She ate some chocolate-covered strawberries. She took a walk outside in the warm sunshine. She went shoe shopping. Ichigo felt much better by dinner time.

As her mom passed her the rice, she asked Ichigo, "Are you feeling better about Aoyama-kun, Ichigo-chan?"

"Who?"

Demi-Disclaimer: There's a bit of Jesus references in here, but we didn't think it was so bad. We're Catholic ourselves, so we mean no disrespect.


	4. The Good, Bad, and Ugly Cowboy Hats

**Disclaimer: No matter HOW HARD WE TRY we cannot seem to get our hand on**

**Zakuro's cowboy hat! It doesn't belong to us, SO JUST DON'T RUB IT IN, OKAY?**

**... What? TMM? Oh, right, well we don't own that either, but who cares about**

**THAT?**

((Preceding Info: Alright! Now how many of you guys out there have seen the

Tokyo Mew Mew anime OR Mew Mew Power? (watches a few hands go up) Okay,

good! Just to recap, as of Saturday, April 30th a particular episode of Mew Mew Power

was on- just in case you haven't got access to the subbed anime- that was the particular

episode where Zakuro is introduced. And near the end of that episode there is a pivotal

scene, at night, when the other four Mew Mews try to convince Zakuro to be on their

team. Nothing wrong with that, right? Right. BUT, Carolina and I(Georgia) happen to be

criminally insane and for the ENTIRE episode, the sole bit of information our peculiar

minds absorbed was the particular piece of headgear Zakuro was sporting.

A brown cowboy hat.

Zakuro- being a model, actress, singer, dancer, WHATEVER- is probably very

rich and has decent fashion taste. HOWEVER, she chose to wear a very ... odd ... hat for

some unexplained reason. But why, why , WHY would ANYONE wear a hat like that? It

was flipped up at the edges and WAS BROWN and it has a matching trenchcoat and ...

and ... ZAKURO WORE A COWBOY HAT. WHAT DOES THAT SAY TO YOU?

It's absolutely hilarious. I didn't have much of any emotion to Zakuro before I

found out she has absolutely fabulous hats like this gorgeous thing (waves brown cowboy

hat in air happily) in her closet. You may have noticed the mentioning of it in the previous

disclaimers . . . (cough) . . . . And for the curious members of our audience, Zakuro's hat

is featured in Episode 10: in the anime Episode 10 was titled as "Saigo no Nakama,

Maboroshi no Ippiki Ookami" (The Final Member, The Illusory Lone Wolf), and Mew

Mew Power aired the same one on April 30th with an episode title of Hollywood Mew

Mew. Do we know our stuff or what?

In short, Zakuro's got this totally awful but really funny brown cowboy hat that

Carolina and I (Georgia) obsess over. We felt it deserved a place in our fic. -.- ))

III. Chapter 3: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly Cowboy Hats

"No, wait! Onee-sama!" Mint protested. "Please join us! You're the final

member!"

Zakuro's distant eyes closed and she spun around with flare. "I've made my

decision," she announced coolly, her back to the Mew Mews. Their fifth comrade walked

away. Mint fell to her knees, forsaken by her idol.

Meanwhile, the three aliens were watching a live recording of the drama from their

ship.

"Pah! I don't see what this has to do with anything!" Tart scoffed, ignoring the

screen.

Kish rolled his eyes. "Even I can see that we can use that one rouge to divide the

others." He looked down derisively at Tart, as if the ginger-haired boy were just a scab

that Kish couldn't wait to flick away. "I suppose we're lucky you can even read," he

smirked. Suddenly, a click-clack toy collided squarely with Kish's forehead. Tart ran and

hid behind Pai, sticking his tongue out at Kish. The green-haired boy growled at Tart as a

large X-shaped bandaid formed magically over the injured spot.

Pai didn't even bother to look up from the screen. "Kish is correct. We could use

the moody one to our advantage. We could make an example of her in front of the

others." Pai paused and turned off the screen. Pai turned around to face the younger

aliens. "Kish, since you seem to know what you're doing, you can take this mission."

Kish nodded curtly and teleported down to Earth. Landing behind the park, he was

pleasantly surprised by spotting Zakuro almost immediately. She was walking purposefully

down the sidewalk, ignoring the turned heads and whispers as she passed. Kish's brow

furrowed. What was she wearing? Soon he became more immersed with her odd brown

trenchcoat and matching cowboy hat more than how he was going to turn her against

Tokyo Mew Mew. Kish shook his head stubbornly. Nevermind that now . . .

Zakuro veered off the main sidewalk and cut through the park where there were

less people. Suddenly, a strong wind swept across the grass. Uprooted weeds and stray

grass blades flew savagely, and even Zakuro's hat was whisked right off her head.

"Hahahahahahahahaa!" laughed a wicked-sounding voice. (While Georgia and

Carolina faint for love of Kish's evil laugh) Zakuro's head jerked upwards to see who it

was. A strangely-clothed young man was floating above her head, arms crossed in

confidence.

"Who are you?" she demanded.

"Call me Kish, honey. I already know you're name, Zakuro, and . . ." he said,

grinning, "I know you're going to help me."

"Never!" Zakuro shouted into the air. "Mew Mew Zakuro METAMORPHOSIS!"

Transformed into Mew Zakuro, the purple-clad heroine stood poised for a fight.

She gripped her Zakuro Spear in her hand and kept a watchful eye on the enemy. What

made that arrogant Kish think she'd ever help him?

Kish laughed again. "Look at yourself!" he ordered with a devilish smile on his

face. "See what they've made of you? That horrid mark across your stomach and those

ears and tail! They've taken the body of an international model and deformed it with

foreign DNA! What makes you think you'd even have a job anymore once your producers

inevitably find out?"

Zakuro's face showed no emotion, but Kish's words sunk in. 'He's lying', she

repeated in her mind. 'He wants you to react. Don't fall for his ploy.' But Kish kept

talking. . .

"You know," Kish began casually, "our species is so advanced that a simple

procedure could rid you of that unwanted DNA lickety-split. All you'd need to do was

come up on the ship with us. Just once. So . . . how 'bout it?"

Zakuro calmly met Kish's eyes. "Do not underestimate Tokyo Mew Mew. Not me,

nor any one person on the team would fall for such shallow deceit. You're going to have

to try harder than that. RIBBON . . . ZAKURO SPEAR!"

Kish dodged the purple steam that lashed through the air. He laughed. " 'Try

harder'? Well, is this difficult enough for you! Attack, Chimera Anima!"

He pitched a glowing jellyfish-like parasite towards the ground. Mew Zakuro

swiftly jumped out of its path, leaving the Chimera Anima nothing to do but to fly directly

into . . . um . . . her hat.

Yup, that's right! Left disregarded on the floor, Zakuro's hat was still in the battle

scene and therefor still fair game. The hat started to gleam and grow larger and larger.

Both fighters were fixed to the spot; they stared in horror, wonder, and

amazement.

The hat grew teeth. Thin, long, pearly white teeth. It stretched its jaws and gnawed

at the air to try out its new appendage

Okay, well now Mew Zakuro and Kish stared mostly in just overwhelming horror.

"What did you do!" Mew Zakuro demanded, backing away from her headpiece.

"I don't know! You were the one who had to go and get out of the way!"

"You can't pin this on me! I didn't make that happen!"

"SKRRREEEEEEEEE!" the enormous monstrosity of a hat screeched in

rage. This caught the other's attention.

Kish looked the creature up and down. He put one hand on his hip and held his

chin with the other hand. "Yeah, well . . . Ah, what the heck?" he muttered to himself,

shrugging. "GO, CHIMERA HAT!"

The hat . . . um, "roared" and lunged at Mew Zakuro. She dove out of the way,

but the hat recovered quickly and chased her, snarling. Mew Zakuro, enhanced with the

DNA of the gray wolf, was fleet and precise, but her hat was better. It was a bit clumsy,

given the fact that the only way it could move was by bouncing, but tagged along behind

her with only a meter of space separating them. Kish watching the article of clothing hunt

after its owner viciously, a confused expression on his face.

"That hat . . . made this is our most successful mission yet . . . What the heck?"

Kish confounded vehemently. "We try so hard to beat those Mew Mews, and one mistake

has suddenly got Mew Zakuro at her wits' end!" he fumed. "What?. . . W-why? . . . . . . I

blame you!" he shouted, jabbing his index finger at Georgia and Carolina, who are typing

innocently. :-)

Dedicated To: The dear hat of Zakuro's which we love very much. We hope it lives a long

and prosperous life, and that Zakuro wears it out more often. XD


End file.
